Okay, I am officially pissed off. At me and at many people around me. I just received news today that a really good friend of mine in Malawi has deteriated quickly in his illness and things aren't looking good. This man has a wife and a young family and has worked so hard to just provide them with a good roof over their heads and food to eat. He has now had to return to the village because he just can't work in the city more. Now he will no longer have any income, as well as being really sick. I don't understand this. How could we in good conscience go about our daily lives when there are families losing Dads and Moms or both. Parents are grieving the loss of their babies, dead in their arms because they starved or had Aids. How do we not care??? Me included! The great Malawi visionary who thinks she's done so much. I haven't done nearly enough!! Even tonight I was bitching about the fact that we were 3 dollars short to register one of our boys in soccer. Bitching about it, meantime my other dear friend in Malalawi is having to compose me a message telling me the news. Really, I can get frazzled over a mere $3.00? Things in my life don't line up as they should, and I can probably say they don't really do in yours either. Now seriously, I'm not trying to lay a guilt trip on you or guilt you into giving money to Hope for Malawi. I don't care where the money goes, if you have extra give it away! Yes, it is that simple. Saving for that rainy day that never comes? Give the money to needy people who sometime only have a few days left unless they are nourished or started on Aids Med. And if that rainy day does come, well sit around a board game and enjoy an evening with your family. I sincerely apologize if I come across harsh. I'm just so angry at myself. I have been so unkind to other humans on the other side of the world. Why? Because me and my family come first. Now yes, we have sacrificied alot to bring money and needed supplies into the country. But is it enough? If I search the very corners of my heart I know it's not enough. Everytime I buy the unneeded pair of pants for my son, it is not enough. Everytime I buy extra treats or desserts in my house, it is not enough. Everytime I download that book or music just because I think I MAY like it, It is not enough. Everytime I cook way too much food and coldly throw away the left overs, it is not enough.
Friends hear me when I say this, IT IS NOT ENOUGH!! We are not doing enough!! My friends are dying in Malawi! Again, I want to explain, we're placed on this side of the earth for a reason, to prosper. In this wealth, it is perfectly normal and good to enjoy the riches you have worked so hard for, we shouldn't all live in grass houses sending all our money to some 3rd world country. If everybody in North America, saved up the value of one thing that day that they didn't really need, and donated it to a good cause, then, that is charity. Charity is a heart attitude not merely just a physical motion. I vow, here today and now that I will continue to put un-needed purchases aside and start saving up again in our Malawi account. You can't deprive yourself of needed family vacations, a roof over your head or even clothes. It's so little what we have to really give in order to actually make a difference. But that's my rant for now.
Please accept my apology again for the rant. I do that sometimes when I'm in a foul mood :)
Yours Truly,
Sue
